Sometimes I forget how much I love my family.
Tonight was the first night I had been to my Grandpa's since he died over a year ago.
I sobbed on the way over. I don't know whether it was the angsty teen ballad playing in the background, but this wave emotion just came over me and I cried.
My Aunt was there and we figured out which key it was to get in the house and went inside.
I hadn't been in that house since February of 09. It was weird looking around and seeing things scattered about to be separated amongst the kids and grandkids. I looked into his bedroom. The room he passed in. It is filled with Christmas things, but when I walked in I just felt him all around me. Like he was hugging me again. I really needed that hug.
My Aunt and I talked for close to 2 hours about everything. My Grandpa, my family, my life, my gramps.. It was so overwhelming.
I have lost two of the most important figures in my life in the past 3 years.
I miss them. My heart aches for them.
But like my Aunt said, "It's just too hard to miss him anymore"
It's true but neither of us can help it.
I learned we are so much alike it is unreal.
I think tomorrow I might pop over to the graves of my grandpa's just to say hi.
It has been too long.