Thursday, July 8, 2010

Day 03.

Day 03 → Something you have to forgive yourself for.

I'm sorry I left so early from the dinner I was at the last time I saw you alive.
I've felt as though I've blown off my family for my friends far too many times.
Especially now.
I'm sorry I didn't come sooner when you were in the hospital and I'm even more sorry that I didn't stay to say how much I love you and good bye.
I'm sorry I haven't laid flowers on your grave recently or had a real conversation with you in so long. I've been struggling to forgive myself for these things but it is hard when I can't help but think the what if's that everyone goes through.
It will be 3 years since you've been gone in October.
I still haven't forgiven myself for not being there.
But I will.
I know you want me to.
I love and miss you so so so much Gramps.
It isn't fair.
-your punkin' seed.

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