Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Friendly Reminder

While I'm here, stealing stuff from this site.. I thought I'd toss you a friendly reminder to come check out the new site where we are discussing worst nightmares today.

Breath Of Ella

Hopefully we see you there!

Friday, October 15, 2010


"There is just something to be said for goodbyes. They are so final. At a funeral, you say goodbye to your departed because it really is goodbye. But, what about every other goodbye? We really don't know how permanent it is."

Woah, 17 year old me was deep.

Well, it is finally time folks. The time where we kiss this sorry ass blog goodbye and open the door to greener and better pastures. Wow, I am seriously full of metaphors today..

Well, this blog has had a good run but I am most certainly ready to close the door on this chapter and turn the page to another.. wait.. thats not right.. but you get the point.

After working my butt off for like.. a month I can finally share the link with you.


There will be stories of all kinds *hopefully* 5 days a week for your pleasure.

Anyways, This is it folks.

Please come join me at my new site.

Thank  you for starting off here!

Sunday, October 3, 2010

Exciting news.

Exciting news!!!

The new site is almost ready to make its appearance. :] I feel like I've been dialated at say.. 9cm for a week and that last centimeter just won't happen (no, I am not pregnant, my friend is and is ready to pop hence the reference) ugh.

Anyways, its almost ready and I'm going to make serious moves today and the next couple of days.

If anyone of you knows how to make a badge have a link to it I would really appreciate the help.

Also, I'm thinking about having a little VIP preview for you that are my loyal followers (sorry about my lack of posts, I've been a busy little thing) to check it out first, tell me what you think, and tell me what I need to fix.

So, there is my quick update on the site.

See you soon! :)

Tuesday, September 28, 2010


The Beginning:

Sunday night, right around 8 oclock, outside of Starbucks (cause I'm that girl) reading Eat, Pray, Love on the verge of tears. It is cold and dark with very little lighting. I'm feeling very much like Elizabeth Gilbert at the beginning of her journey when she is absolutely miserable where she is. I'm crying at all hours of the night and sometimes day, I'm not happy all the time, but some of the time. It just isn't a good place for me to be me in my life.. Or maybe I'm just back to looking for me. I'm starting to read about her journey into India (part 2 in the book, or of the trinity) when I look up and find myself in serious need of something.. Anything to remind me that its going to be okay. Somehow, I am Liz, on the bathroom floor, asking for what to do, only I'm outside of Starbucks and in the cold.

That's when my epiphany happens...

It played out a little like this..

There was music playing all the while I sat outside. I ignored it for the most part except for the occasional high note that was just a bit louder than the rest of the song. I stop for a brief moment to take a deep breath and gather my surroundings and to decide if it is a little too dark to stay up here thats when I hear it..

"2am and she calls me cause I'm still awake"

Something triggers in my head..

"Can you help me unravel my latest mistake, I don't love him and winter just wasn't my season"

The lights turn on outside of Starbucks...

"Yeah we walk through the doors, so accusing their eyes"

Two gentlemen walk by me in silence..

"Like they have any right at all to criticize"

One looks back to look at the girl, sitting in the cold.
"Hypocrites. You're all here for the very same reason"

Suddenly, I'm not cold anymore.

"Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable"

I close my eyes.

"And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table"

I hear something surrounding me.
"No one can find the rewind button, girl."

Its me singing..
"So cradle your head in your hands"

I know this song..

"And breathe... just breathe,"

And then, I get my answer.

"Oh breathe"

The one I've been asking for all along..

 "just breathe"

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Stop the War In My Rack.

Sorry about the cliffhanger yesterday.

Unfortunately, your kinda stuck wondering until I get my life back together and I can pretty much guarantee this is going to be a long and grueling process.

My emotional strength is definitely going to be tested.

Meanwhile, I'll sit back, read my books, do my mantras and drink my coffee. Oh, and I suppose I'll write here and there as well. :)


Last night my mom came home from an awards dinner that was celebrating the fundraising her company did for Breast Cancer. Of course, this was after I got all panicky because she wasn't home and it was 9pm and my mom is never home later than 7:30 or 8, even when she gets home from dinner. I'm a total momma's girl and I wouldn't have it any other way :)

feel free to poke fun.

It reminded me of the day she came home from the event and told me all about the fun boobie things, cause I mean really, who doesn't love to talk about boobs?
*I apologize to those of you that cringe at the mere mention of any body parts.

I think it was April or May of last year when my mom came home all pumped up to beat Breast Cancer and of course a little ferklempt at all the stories shared.

That's when she told me the BEST team name ever for their Breast Cancer Walk.

STOP THE WAR IN MY RACK. (pink for breast cancer awareness YEEAH!)

I think I died on the spot, went to heaven and have been living there ever since.

I immediately went into, OMG I can totally market this and raise a boob ton of money for breast cancer awareness because holy crap that is the most clever thing I have ever heard.

I went as far as to get someone to design the shirts and then absolutely nothing ever happened with it. I didn't have the money to do the project nor did I have enough people interested in helping me out. It was a huge let down.

I still loved the saying and everytime we talk about boobs in my house, which is more regular than people would like to believe, I ask if someone has stopped the war in my rack yet.

I truly believe that one day, the answer will be yes and I pray that it will happen in my lifetime.

But seriously, I wish there was more I could do other than just give money and continue to send the best vibes I got out to those researchers who are working ridiculously hard to find the cure.

So, I'll take a step outside of the box and get a little raunchy in hopes that my female readers (are there any men??) will listen and get fired up like I am.

First of all, Getting felt up isn't all that bad... When you are checking for lumps that aren't there!!

That's right, just cop a feelsky on yourself once a month and pretty soon you'll be able to tell if something is there that wasn't before.

hell, go ahead and let your lover do it for ya if your feelin frisky.

Also, go to the doctor and get the proper examinations getting felt up by your doctor (male or female) or getting a mammogram is nothin' compared to actually finding out you have Breast Cancer and going through treatment.

Okay, so thats my health advice for the year and I hope you aren't all like "Ella, hello, thats common knowledge, way to waste my time telling me things I already know"

Sorry if that is the case, but anything for the cause right?

Say it with me now...



Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Cloudy with a chance of Word Vomit.

So the unbelievable has happened to me this week..

I have learned something new about myself..

I know, totes what you were thinking right?


Sorry for the huge let down on that one.. actually, no I'm not.

Anynews, I guess that this new thing isn't really new, it just came more to light for me than it had before.

I am an over sharer.

Whew, feels good to get that one out there.

I swear to you it's like something happens to me and I want to spew it out to anyone, and I mean anyone, who will listen. It's bad people.. BAD.

For example, Monday was my Gramps' birthday and I was super emotional because I hadn't been to the grave in some time and was just a little freaky about going there. I told anyone and everyone that would listen. At one point I remember thinking to myself "I have asked you 3 times what your plan is for the day, ASK ME WHAT MINE IS SO I CAN TELL YOU I'M ALL EMOTIONAL AND FREAKY ABOUT GOING TO THE CEMETERY!!!!", cause I'm super psycho like that.

I need a muzzle  someone to talk to right now because I'm going through all of this really icky yucky emotional junk and I am seriously struggling to keep all of it to myself especially since it is no one elses business but mine. The words sit on my tongue like something that tastes really bad, the moment its there, you just want to spit it out.

Don't get me wrong, I only spill MY secrets/issues/whateverishappeninginmylife. I'm actually really good at keeping other people's secrets because I definitely have a killer conscience. Seriously, Connie (my pet name for my conscience) and I have this awesome relationship where if I even think about leaking someone elses information anywhere she hits me hard with some sort of body ailment that puts me in bed for some time. She's a peach.

Your secrets are safe with me. Except from my journal (that i hide) or from the police if you like murdered someone or something, because I am TOTALLY not going to keep that secret for you.. It would make me an accomplice. I don't think so.

WOAH, just got WAY off topic..

As for me, myself and I, I'm just a sharer, a perpetual sharer.

It is taking everything in me to not tell you all of the crap I am currently dealing with.
I want to so badly. You are the people that I have turned to for other things and you tend to get me and have these awesome words of advice and encouragement. But I can't bring myself to put it out here in the internets.. At least not yet.

And if you are anything like me, your curiosity is getting the better of you and you are about ready to punch your computer screen (or hunt me down, whatevs) because you want to know what in the heck little miss Ella is dealing with that she won't tell us. I totally would.

Well, I'm going to go stick my head back into some dirt and pray that no one comes to me today wanting to know how I'm feeling or how I'm doing, I don't think I'm going to last much longer.. I can already feel the shell cracking...



*I'll be posting here until the new site is up and i promise I'll do a better job of it. I've been kind of the suck lately at this.. I'm also hoping to get my new site up and running by the end of this month/early October.

**Find me on twitter @stella_ella and "@" me so I know who you are!!!

Thursday, September 16, 2010

I'm poking my head out from under my rock for a minute.

Hi all.

I've been hiding under a rock.

Cause my life is crazy right now between work, my personal life and working on my new site.

Good things are happening though.

Like the badge that Midwestern Mama H made for me recently... That makes me all giddy in all sorts of inappropriate places. :)

I'll keep you posted.

And remind me to tell you about the girl that hit on me at Red Lobster.
It's pretty awesome.

And if you don't already, follow me on twitter -@stella_ella "@" me so I know who you are!

Sunday, September 12, 2010

New things are happening.

Dear loves (all of you reading),

I wanted to let you know that I am in the process of building a newer and better website for your enjoyment. One that is more focused on the weird things that happen to me, one that catches your eye, one that is everything you want .. and more.

In order for this to work, I obviously need your help.
Suggestions, designs, buttons (yours of course, so please send 'em my way if you have 'em), ideas, title (although I think I have a pretty good one in the works) and ANYthing else you think of.

If you have any questions, comments, concerns please email me here.

Or feel free to hop onto twitter and ask @stella_ella

If you don't follow me, but decide to, please message me so I can follow you back!

Well, I'm off to *hopefully* have a good (but weird) day with my family.

I can't wait to see what suggestions & ideas you have!


Friday, September 3, 2010

Wood. Its inapprop.

As most people know and understand, New Englanders have a wicked accent (varies depending on where you are).

I absolutely adore said accent.
It makes me blush, makes me laugh and makes me want to talk to EVERYONE within 100 feet of me.

One chat I had sticks out in my mind because it was quite hysterical and all 15 of us staying at the house laughed about it for a LONG time.

I was on my way back from Portsmouth NH (Absolutely beautiful, do yourself a favor and go there) with my Sissy, Brohem, Cousin and her husband when we decided "hey lets have a bonfire tonight"

So what do you always need when you have a bonfire or campfire?


We didn't think there would be much firewood around the house we were staying and didn't think it would be a good idea to chop any of the trees down so our only option was to stop somewhere to ask where we could get firewood.

There wasn't much of anything in the little teeny tiny village we were staying in, it was the kind of place where EVERYTHING closed at 6pm.

So we stopped at a Rite Aid on the way home. We didn't see any firewood outside of the store and being the baby of the family, I was forced to go inside to inquire about firewood.

Me - "Excuse me, Do you have any firewood?"

Clerk - "Fiyahwood*? I don think we have any fiyawood."

Me - "Oh, well could you possibly tell me a place we could stop to get some?"

Clerk - "lemme think heyah**  .. oh I know who can give you some wood, Do yah got cellphone?"

Me - "Yes...?"

Clerk - "Alright, well I'm gonna write down a numbah for yew, The guys name is Powl*** and he can get you wood."

Me - "uhh.."

Clerk - "Powl gave me wood a few yeaas**** ago, real noice kid, yew should give 'im a cowl***** Powl will help you get wood. He is just sucha noice yung man. Likes to help others no matter what, yew should definitely cowl Powl."

Me - "Thanks, yeah, I'll give Paul a buzz....."

Clerk - "Powl will give you all the wood yew need. He gives wood to the whole town."

I could continue, but I think you understand why this conversation was hysterical. If you don't here are some key points..

  1. Paul gives wood to everyone all over town
  2. Paul will be more than willing to give me wood
  3. She actually gave me this guys number
  4. AND wouldn't stop saying the word "wood"
I felt violated in New Hampshire. And I do a mean New England accent when called upon to retell said story.

Anywood, we left and not 30 seconds later came across a gas station that had fire wood.

Needless to say...

We didn't call Powl.

*Fiyahwood - Firewood
** heyah - here
*** Powl - Paul
****yeaas - years
*****cowl - Call

My trip to New Hampshire Part 3.

My grandma is a funny lady. She gets even funnier as she gets older. It makes family vacations and the dinners I have with her that much more amazing.

Out in New Hampshire we had quite a few conversations about many weird things.
Actually, come to think of it, I had a lot of weird conversations out in New Hampshire. I guess that is just part of my all star charm. dontjudgeme.

One day, my grandma and I were on our way down to the beach to swim with my eldest cousin and her baby.

WAIT, I'm getting ahead of myself. Let's try this again..

Now, to understand the conversation we had you need a little background information.. Like.. I haven't bought a bathing suit in 3 years. 3 YEARS. So, obvs I didn't have one packed for New Hampshire. I don't even own one that fits. Welp, my sister said she brought an extra that I could use. No worries right? Well, the perfect day came about to go swimming and I took a look at that bathing suit and thought for sure it wouldn't fit me... considering my sister is WAY more blessed than me. I mean, there isn't even a comparison. BUT when I looked at the bathing suit, my immediate reaction "THERE IS NO WAY THAT IS GOING TO FIT MY ASS" (It looked too big yo)

So I took my parents car and drove to Wal *YUCK* and attempted to find a bathing suit. All I could find were bottoms. So I went to the counter..

"So, do we like, bring up the bottoms and you hand us the top or are you just out of tops?"
"snickers... We are just out of tops"
"So I'm going topless.. great."

So I left and headed back to the house bathing suitless and pretty peeved that I was just going to watch them swim and enjoy themselves.

Grandma - "Didja get a bathing suit Ellie?" (My entire family calls me Ellie, don't hate on it)

Me - "No, they only had bottoms. So I would've had to go topless."

Grandma - "So you got some bottoms?"

Me - "No Grandma. I didn't get anything because I would have had to go topless."

Grandma - "What's wrong with going topless? You should just go topless. Its not like no one here has seen 'girls' before"

Me - *crickets*

Grandma - "Seriously, I don't see the problem with it. You should just go topless."

Me - "I'm going to give Sissy's bathing suit a try"

Grandma - "Okay, I'll wait here for you."

So amazingly enough, the bathing suit did fit my tushy and my bosom. I walked my happy ass out the door with my grandma by my side only to have this conversation...

Grandma - "I see the bathing suit fits"

Me - "Yeah, I guess my butt is bigger than I thought."

Grandma - "You get that from me. I have a BIG BUTT. Nothing to be ashamed of"

Me - "I know I got from you,  no one on dad's side has much of a butt."

Grandma - "Be grateful, boys LOVE big butts. I hear about that all the time. Big butts are a good thing these days. Do boys say anything to you about your butt?"

Me - (as if this is the most natural conversation I have ever had with her..) "Grandma, you should hear what these boys say about my butt! They just LOVE it. I mean, they call it a bubble butt, a fine specimen, you name it, I've apparently got it."

Grandma - "Well at least I know I did one thing right by you."

Yes. That is 100% the truth.
My grandma and I talked about boys liking big butts.

Weird right?

Stay tuned for what I promised from part 2 and another conversation post (the convo post to be shared later today) .

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

My journey to New Hampshire Part 2.

First and Foremost.
Proof of my epic game of Scrabble from Part 1.

I couldn't contain myself, it was too funny

Now onto the next bit of my trip.

I arrived in Boston practically peeing myself everywhere I went because I was finally in a place I had dreamed to go for so (ohmygod you don't even know) long.

I was picked up from the airport by my brohem (brother-in-law) and my sister and taken to lunch to a tasty little place called 'Water on the Tavern'. There, I had lobster from the East Coast for the first time ever. It was absolutely gorgeous and I fell 100% in love with the city. I'm waiting for brohem to email me the pictures with Boston as my backdrop. :]

From there, we left to make our trek to New Hampshire.

We got through the city listening to some fantastic songs from the 80's, 90's & early 00's. It was too fun. Once we were out of the city, we hooked up my ipod (the one C let me borrow) and listened to Glee.

We stopped at a rest stop that had a liquor store attached.. Umm.. this kind of thing does NOT happen in Michigan, so obviously they went inside & bought some booze for when we got to the house.

Hopped back on the road and eventually found the road the house was on and went on a hunt for address 194 LakeShore (or maybe it was NorthShore) and thought we were done! Well, we drove around for 45 minutes... there was no 194 anywhere.

There was 190, 192 and 200, but no 194. Of course, we had zero service up there so getting ahold of anyone in the family was impossible AND my phone and my sisters phone were dead. What do we do? We stop at the village shop and ask.

After they met the town cop, Travis, and the fire chief, not too sure what his name was, they called the 911 disbatcher for the village and she said there was no address 194 in the surrounding 3 towns on any of the roads.

We were stumped.
We were frustrated.
Tension was really high.

I just sat in my corner in the back seat praying WWIII wouldn't break out in the front seat.

We drove around attempting to find my cousin's house to no avail, EVEN pulled into address 192 and drove all the way back hoping that 194 was at the end of the driveway... Nope, just a gorgeous beach and lake. So we drove around some more.. until...

We drove by 192 again and ALAS... there were cars in the driveway and people that looked to be our family members milling about. We pulled in and all was well..

Minus us bitching about 194 not existing and the retort being


194 was in the rental agreement, but know this.. The address to the house we stayed at in New Hampshire was 192 NorthShore.

We then settled in with each other and despite living hundreds (if not thousands) of miles away, it was like we had never left. Conversation flowed and laughter ALWAYS followed. We joked about befriending Travis the village cop, walked to the beach, had Chinese for dinner, played games, it was glorious.

I did have to share a room with Grandma, which I thought was going to be a pain in the hind end, but it turned out to be not so bad. :] She is a neat lady and I absolutely adore her.


So thats part 2. Just 3 days worth of the craziness. I'm hoping to consolidate and only have 4 written parts and 1 photo entry. Then, it will be back to my regular shenanigans. :)

Stay tuned for: Crazy Ella/Grandma conversations, that time we got lost in Maine, our joint birthday party, and FIMMY. :)

Monday, August 23, 2010

My journey to New Hampshire Part 1.

As you recall from this awesome(?)..no... insane post from last Thursday, I was having one helluva day.

Now you know that I never just go through anything without a glitch here and there. It just isn't in my lifeline.

So, after work I rushed out of here to go and clean out my car. I made that Alfie (the car) look frackin' BEAUTIFUL. I mean seriously, he was spotless. I even told the bf that no one was ever allowed to bring anything into my car EVER again because it was just so purdy.

Well, things are going well, Alfie is shining, I'm making plans to finish vacation stuff with my mom, there is like zero traffic, when I sense my car is slowing down a bit..

"I probably just need gas" I think to myself and keep chugging along.


WTF is that noise?

I took my foot off the accelerator and it stopped.. I then put my foot back down and..

I thought there was a bomb in my car.. But then I rationalized with my brain that people are not out there trying to bomb me.. (seriously, I am terrified that will happen to me.)

At this point I am pleading with Alfie to get me home so that I can deal with it there..

Alfie had no plans to get me home.

When I got off the expressway things seemed to be fine, I breathed a sigh of relief that maybe JUST MAYBE I'd get home okay.

Then I went to turn the car and my power steering went KAPUT. Then I smell something...


I freaked right out and jumped outta my car thinking there really was a bomb.
By this point, not one bone in my body was rational.
I was shaking furiously, called my father, dropped an eff bomb (you should know that I have NEVER said the eff word in front of my dad or even within hearing range) and had him come to get me and try to fix Alfie.

People are stopping left and right, I'm trying not to panic being on the side of the road.
Also, people were nice enough to stop and try to help me because I'm not the creepy serial killer dude!!!!

So we poked and prodded at my car and finally got the hood open (what? my latch is broken.. it is an old car okayyyy?) I kept telling them to hit the hood it would pop open and after like 25 minutes of my dad and some lady trying to pry it open my dad punched the hood and BOOM. Open hood. :)

So, apparently, a hose is broken (don't I wish that was all) and it must be towed.

Dad took me home, and took off to get the car towed (THANK YOU DADDY :])
Mom and I went and finished our vacay shopping and then came home where I scrambled to get packed and finish making birthday cards for my uhh-mazing family. At about 1am, knowing I had to be up in 5 hours (less really) to be to the event on time, I finally went to bed just feeling like I was forgetting something.. Which was a very REAL possibility.

I woke up, got ready for the event and ventured out into the world in my dad's mini-van. Yup, I was a total soccer mom minus the whole kid thing. Thank goodness I could justify driving it with our Clays tournament.

So, the Clays tournament went really well without any issues, except for the fact that there was no relief anywhere from the heat. I swear I burned up ALL DAY LONG and smelled awful by the time I hit the road to head for my sister's in laws house.

I arrived there after about an hour and not too much traffic. Sat and talked with my brohem's dad and went to bed.

Woke up at 4 and laid there for 45 minutes until I had to get up. Got ready in record time and headed for the airport.

Once at the airport, I checked in and made my way to the gate.

"Atlanta? That isn't where I'm going.." I was so confused. I walked up and down Metro trying to figure out where it was I was going.. I looked at every screen and they all said Gate A29. Umm, EARTH TO ELLA, next time, check and see if your flight is ON TIME.

Needless to say, it wasn't and I was stuck in the airport for 5 hours.

I met two people from Ghana that invited me to play a rip roaring game of Scrabble with.
I won on two words.
Queer for 43 points
HAHA for 12 points.


Then I waited around for another 4 hours, hopped on a plane and landed in Boston 2 hours later.


So, stay tuned for tomorrow for Part 2 and evidence of my epic game of Scrabble.

Missed you all.

Saturday, August 21, 2010

quick update.

Just an update.

I'm still alive and (kind of) well.

Things haven't slowed down at all at work.

I do have some fabulous stories and pictures for you from New Hampshire.

Just not today..

I have this cold that is completely fogging my brain and I can hardly form sentences. Yes, that refers to on here and when I speak, its frustrating. Also, it makes my brain hurt.

Alright, so I'm going to get back to laying around and mindlessly watching TV.

I really missed you all.

Sunday, August 15, 2010


Alright, I'm still relaxing (if you can call it that) and have no real motivation now to write a little message to you. But luckily, this lovely lady has got a voice and she is here to share it with you!!!

Give a Warm Welcome to Holly!!!


Hello Ella's Readers!  

     My name is Holly, and I regularly blog over here at yourstrulyh.blogspot.com.  Ella presented members of 20sb with an opportunity to guest blog while she's away.  I sent her an email and we were instant buddies.  I asked her what kind of content she wanted, and she was pretty lenient. At first, I thought that was awesome.  Then...

I somewhat sort of panicked.  I was hoping she would say, "Give me 600 words or less about your favorite childhood memory" or "I need a 10 step tutorial on how to decoupage an old vase using only duct tape and dental floss." Done. and Done.  

But she didn't.  She said, "You have free reign."  

Holy cow.  

My friend Carmen says that the most important part of writing and journalism is having the ability to look at everything around you and ask yourself, "Is there a story in that?"  

fNo. wait.  

"WHERE is the story in that? "

And then (to make a long story short), I started thinking about toothpaste.  Actually, I started thinking more about the actual ACT of  brushing my teeth.  

    My husband and I didn't live together before we got married (I know, crazy, right!?!?!).  We bought a house and eventually moved all our "stuff" under one roof.  It took us a long time to transition.  We had duplicates of almost everything for a very long time (toasters, coffee makers, etc.).  I remember having two separate tubes of toothpaste and looking forward to the day we would finally be down to ONE tube.  For some reason, that was the the proverbial bottle to the ship, cutting of the ribbon, etc.  That would be the sign that we had officially started a life together.  

So, with that being said, here is a list of ways that love (romantic or otherwise) is like brushing your teeth.  

Sometimes I forget.  I forget that love and good hygiene are pursuits that have to be maintained.  That is the hardest of hardest work- the maintaining.  

Sometimes I don't want to brush my teeth.  When I am totally in a hurry and you smell kind of funny and I am feeling extra-grumpy- no. I don't want to love you and no, I don't want to brush my teeth.  

Love and teeth-brushing?  Well, you are always better off because of  it in the end.  

If you don't maintain a healthy set of chompers, sometimes it takes a long time for the consequences to come back and bite you (pun intended).  By the time you realize you have let things go South, its often too late to salvage very much.  

The more you do it, the more likely people are going to want to be around you.  

So, there you have it.  The story within the story of dental hygiene.  Next time you are doing something utterly mundane and everyday-ish, look for the story.  Chin up, there's a good journalist in you, yet.  

Love and minty freshness, 

Saturday, August 14, 2010


Heyo, it's me again, I just wanted to pop in and let you know that by now I should be on my way from Boston to New Hampshire with my Sister and Brother-In-Law. It's likely I've finished a book and am crying a little on the inside because I didn't get to check out Boston.

Now, Moriah is one of my favorite bloggers because she seriously has one of the cutest babies I have ever seen. I love her pictures and video's of Josiah. I love that I can see him grow and change from a million miles away. Not to mention she is one of the sweetest women I know without ever having met her.

Without further ado...

Moriah from Josiah's Nest!


Hey, everyone. My name is Moriah. I write for Josiah's Nest {josiahsnest.com}, a personal blog about my life as a wife and new mom. Most of my posts are about my baby.  Since that's what people seem to want to read. Nobody really cares about me. So, that's why I took up the offer to guest post for Ella today. To talk about me. Not the baby {although, I think you really would love to hear about the baby}. 

Anyway. Today's post is about Pet Peeves. We've all got 'em. Some more annoying that others. But, we've all got 'em.  I was going to come up with a Top 10 list to share, but I couldn't figure out which one to cut out. So, instead, here's my Top 11 list, in no particular order:

- Girls who don't wear bras
- Food Network chefs who talk with their mouths full
- Pretentiousness
- Couples who sit on the same side of the booth when there's nobody on the other side
- People who get easily offended
- Conspiracy Theorists
- Picky Eaters
- People who give their kids weird names {don't look at me}
- An unorganized utensil drawer
- People who will write something borderline mean, but then follow it up with a smiley face :) 
- Brenden Fraser

What are your pet peeves? 

Friday, August 13, 2010

Stay At Home Babe!

Today's post is from a fellow bunny (you'll hear about this soon enough) of mine.. Stay At Home Babe!

She is fabulous, funny, and full of everything I wish I could say on here.
I hope you love her as much as I do.

Right now I am at the tournament and probably sweating profusely. TMI? Too bad.
Soon, I'll be on my way to my Brother-In-Law's folks house so they can take me to the airport at the butt crack of dawn on Saturday.

Anywho, here is a quick something that Nathan @ Upstart Blogger said...

"A recent development on the blogging front is the prolific presence
of mommy bloggers. But in a landscape of virtual baby books and family
photo albums there is a new kid on the block, Stay At Home Babe
(http://stayathomebabe.blogspot.com/). As her tagline reads, “I’m not
a housewife. I like profanity. I’m a Stay At Home Babe.” She's armed
with a full sleeve tattoo, some cleaning supplies, a dash of profanity
and a sardonic wit that translates well to charm and she tells it like
it is! With fearless disclosure and a hilarious narrative, Stay At
Home Babe discusses her move to England, marriage, motherhood,
womanhood and every-day life in a way that makes you wonder what she
could possibly say tomorrow (and she posts every day)! Step away from
the piles of laundry to fold and forget the dusting because this is
where it’s at; read her and see for yourself. When you find yourself
going back for more, you can thank me later."

Give it up for...

Stay At Home Babe!


As a child of the 80’s—hey, ’81 is still the 80’s… and that makes me Generation Y… stop imagining me older than I am!—I am proud to say that we have a knack for making things dirrrrty. One place where I think we went horribly, horribly wrong with this tendency is at-home sex toy parties. You know the ones? My mother’s generation would gather all their friends in their living rooms on a Friday evening and a Tupperware sales (usually woman) person would come explain how the right storage containers could change their lives and they would have a glass of wine and buy Tupperware. We took this concept and applied it to sex toys. Cringe.

I’m sorry, we all know that I will talk about my vagina and even some details of my sex life or even sometimes, sometimes my husband's awesome penis, but I don’t want to know what kind of dildo my closest friends prefer to have inserted into their asses and what kind of lube they want to use and why. It just creeps me out. Nor do I want them to see the kinky shit I wanna buy. And I’m not much more comfortable going into those skeezy sex toy shops and talking to some perv behind the counter about it either; much less touching things that have been sitting on shelves right next to the video booths where people go to get blowjobs from strangers on their lunch breaks! Then… then, I’m supposed to buy it and take it into my home?! Yuck.

Thank god for the internet. Thank god for a place where I can buy straight off the warehouse shelf and no creepy sex juice residue from the perverted lunch-break-blowjob people has been smeared on the packaging. Thank god for people like Amber from http://www.scarlets-letter.net/ (I don’t get any money from her for any reason. If you visit, buy, or disregard makes no monetary difference to me! I endorse her because she’s awesome.) who explain the ups and downs—no pun intended—of various sex toys and accessories to blow-job-booth-phobics like myself. Because I am definitely sexually liberated enough to buy my husband enough porn to sink a battleship during my ninth month of pregnancy (it was his birthday), but I do not want to talk to my closest friends or the sex shop people about what I do or do not like up my ass. Call me prude. Soooo, if you’re looking for some good advice on what to buy, why to buy it, and where to buy it from (because let’s face it, buying online can be a craps shoot) then hop on over to Amber’s little corner of the world. You’ll thank me later.

I can’t imagine what my Google ads are going to look like today :). I can also promise you that none of the ads on my site, sponsored by Google (which, given this content will likely be about porn and sex toys), will give you any nasty e-cooties if you want to purchase said sex toys through them. However, I would suggest checking out Amber’s advice before you buy!

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Till we meet again.

Let me just start off by saying this weekend has already gotten off to a fantastic start.

That is seriously laughable right now.

I'll explain more when I get home, unless there is internet out in New Hampshire at the house we are staying in, then I'll explain it while I'm away.

I'm setting you up with some fantastic ladies this weekend.

I hope you enjoy them as much as I do.

Miss you all already.

The episode where Ella examines her own flaws, caffeine addiction, serial killers & asks for help. You best believe its random.

I am wired.

I have had 3 cups of coffee, a coke, and am working my way through an iced caramel machiato (spelling?).

Yeah. I'm bouncing off the walls hyper and I don't think I've ever typed so fast in my entire life.

Caffeine is my crack today and when I crash, it is going to be bad.

But I think I'll stay loaded up until I can crash because being the little procrastinator that I am I have left all of my vacation stuff last minute as well as preparing our event till the VERY last minute. I need to get out of here by 5 today,  but I'm not sure that is going to happen. I'm just screwed. SCREWED PEOPLE.

I wish I could teleport somebody up in here to help me because I could sure use it.

I have to:

-Finish prepping for sporting clays

-Do whatever side work needs to be done since EVERYONE is riding my ass about it today (i'm so immature I'm giggling at me typing riding my ass, ohp! there I go again tehe)

-Clean out my car so that we can pack it full of Event stuff tomorrow

-Eyebrows waxed (they are in desperate need and frankly, i won't have time to pluck tonight)

-Pick up canvas's for NH so I can paint my little heart out when we have down time, or family time.. whichever bores me first (just kidding about the family time, so EXCITED to see everyone!!!)

-PACK MY FRACKIN' SUITCASE so that I don't have to scramble to do it tomorrow night before I head to my sisters in laws to take me to the airport at 5 freakin 30 in the morning.

-Pick up the stupid $10 gift my grandma has been reminding me to get for 2 MONTHS.

Did I mention I procrastinate A LOT?

Shoot... I wish I didn't.. I should probably work on that.

OHHH and I have to prep some blog posts for you for while I'm gone and let me tell you I have some great stuff coming your way.. Hopefully you don't ditch me to go be friends with them cause i really like you guys. A whole bunch.

Now, uhh, I've put off doing work for what little time I could and now have to get back to the task at hand.. I can't stay late remember?

Oh geez.. I feel another tangent coming on..

Stay with me people.

The little city I live in has (possibly now had) a serial Killer.


This guy was asking people to help him out with his car between the hours of 2 and 3 in the morning when he would stab them randomly. 16 people have been stabbed in F*town, 5 are dead. There was an attack in Toledo, OH and Leesburg (I think)VA. Supposedly they've caught the bastard and he will be put down.. OH WAIT.. Michigan doesn't have the Death Penalty.. Not that I support it but the mricker fricker scared me half to death stabbing people 3 MILES FROM MY HOUSE.

This is so typical of my life..
[someone upstairs gets a real kick out of messing with me thats for sure]

I would have a SERIAL KILLER attacking people 3 miles from my effin' house.

This is my life, where shit gets REAL real quick. or something like that.. I never really got into the Real World on MTV..

oooo, maybe someone could help me make that my tag line since I'm basically perpetually sharing with you the randomness that is my life. :)

I love you all and should REALLY get back to work.

Talk to you soon..

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

[insert sad face here]

I apologize in advance for this post. I'm probably going to be a bit dramatic and sobby, but please.. bear with me.

I feel like I'm falling apart.

I can only stand here and watch as a tornado rips through my life and inch by inch, destroys every piece of solid ground I've ever been able to stand on. It is tearing away the beauty and peace that I have found in myself and I just want it to stop. I want to chase it away and start to rebuild what it has destroyed.

I don't know what to do with myself anymore. Every move seems to be the wrong move for somebody somewhere. I hate letting people down. It is a serious flaw of mine.

I work my butt of to make sure people don't get the wrong impression of me. I wear what fits my body so I don't have people behind my back saying "That girls pants are just a size too small, look at those love handles!" I put my make up on in the morning to cover any blemishes that have appeared over night so people don't think I don't wash my face or take care of my skin. I plaster a smile on my face and am polite everywhere I go, just so that I can make someone's day somewhere. I open doors, I pay my bills on time, I help people when I can etc.. etc..

I can't stand the thought of somebody not liking me or not approving of me in some way shape or form.

I am a good person, at least thats what my mom tells me.

I probably try too hard.

I probably care too much.

It's my curse.


It hit me today that I am a real mess, when a man walked back into our office after nearly 4 months of being sick.

2 Days ago I was speaking with someone about this man.
"It was real touch & go for a while there.. none of us thought he would make it.."

We are so grateful he did.

Today, this man walked in and came up to me to say Good Morning.
He is probably one of the sweetest elderly men I have ever come across and truly reminds me of my Grandfather[s]. He smiled and waltzed into the conference room across from my office. I cleaned off my mess of supplies, off the table, for the event I'm preparing for and he sat down. I walked out of the room back to my office when i heard more voices than usual coming from our production room..

6 women and 1 gentleman are sitting in this room chatting, drinking coffee and generally having lovely conversation while this Man sits in the conference room, all alone.

I don't know why but my eyes started watering and I shuffled back to my office for a few minutes to gather my thoughts and compose myself.

Why was he forced to sit alone in the conference room?
Was there some kind of sick and twisted punishment going on that no one thought to tell me.

It took everything I had in me not to cry as I watched him work.

He didn't move much and had this look on his face. One that would shatter every grandpa's girls heart. The one where Grandpa is sad to see you go, and just wants one more hug.

I hated seeing him alone. It was breaking my heart into a million little pieces.

Then, I was alone, in my office. Nothing but work to take my mind off of everything.
I wasn't very productive.

The situation somehow turned into a metaphor for my life.

I don't ever want to end up alone in the conference room doing work.

Um.. irrational much?
I think yes.

So, to the Man that sat 5 feet from me all morning, I'm sorry I didn't come in and have a conversation with you. I guess I don't know what I would say but if I had known what to say, I would have.

I told you. My life is falling apart. And I'm doing everything in my power to hold together the pieces. I'm holding it together because I know all will be well sooner than later and in a few months I'll look back and laugh over my momentary freak out.


Well, I certainly hope so.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

I should have been a trucker or a sailor.

From the time I realized I could drive, I wanted to.

To be out on the open road, wind in my hair, experiencing freedom like I had never had..

Yeah, like every other American teenager, I wanted my license more than anything else.. other than, perhaps, a car.

Of course, I wasn't very good about driving when I had my permit. I didn't want to. It was snowy and a girl from my high school had just died in a car accident. I was freaked the eff out.  BUT... My parents still made me drive. I had to get some experience.. right?

Then.. it happened.  I turned 16 I got my license.

I was ready to drive..

I was on the road, experiencing the ultimate freedom (in my mind okay?) I was at peace with anything and everything around me. No fights were going to go unforgiven, I had found a cure for cancer, the war was over, I was in a state of Nirvana like no (hu)man had ever experienced.

and then some jack ass cut me off and it was game over.

You know in the movie Mean Girls how Cady has those weird little animal fantasies? Well, I was in that zone.. Apparently honing my inner gorilla and just absolutely lost it.

I was shouting profanities left and right, flippin' the bird, trying to decide whether following him was a good idea or not and of course what I would say to the mthfckr if I did..

It was over. This guy ruined my peace of mind. My sanity (apparently).

Now when I'm on the road and someone cuts me off I shout at the top of my lungs (as if they can hear me) every nasty word I can think of as well as some pointers on how to ACTUALLY FLIPPIN' DRIVE. C has been apart of these phone calls, he can atest to the crazy I am out on the road.

I have yelled at many a car and have made it impossible for many more cars to pass me.. but I will say, I have never actually acted on my road rage. I've seen the accidents they cause and the lives that are lost just because someone got angry. I keep that in the back of my mind as I remind myself that ramming my car into his bumper will do no one any good.

Ye be warned, stay away from my craziness on the road!

Well, I know I'm not the only one out there with this issue...

What are your stories? Are you actually a peaceful driver?

Monday, August 9, 2010

so what do you say?

Holy mother of [insertnamehereatyourdiscretion].

In exactly 5 days, I will be on a plane heading for New Hampshire (well, Boston then driving to New Hampshire with sissy and brosef). I can't even express to you how much I am looking forward to getting out of this orange barrel state and having 5 days with family, reading and painting. I am beyond thrilled that I will be able to just stand somewhere and just paint for a few hours and hopefully come up with something decent. :)

I really need a change of scenery.

After working my tushy off all last week (including bringing work home) and having another extremely full week ahead of me, I'm just praying I survive to get on my plane Saturday morning.

In the mean time I will be trying to get my life together in a suitcase, planning/organizing/keeping my bosses head together, writing, and pulling together the guest posts for you all.

I will try my darndest to get back to posting regularly but if it doesn't happen in the next 2 weeks I apologize from the bottom of my superexcited heart. :)


I do have a post in mind thats about my road rage. I'll be sharing that with you later today (hopefully).

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Hold the phone


This amazing diddy made my whole freakin' day.

check em out.

and since you are probably seeing this, make sure to read the post below first!

Edit:I also found this. Funny & cute.

A terrible situation made funny by texting.

I was going to write this great thing about how much I love food and the weird habits I have when it comes to eating.. but, without fail, my life has handed my another sick and devious hand in the card game of life.

My car was broken into last night.
In my own driveway.

I feel so violated.

I feel threatened.

Of course, the police can't do anything until after 12noon today. So I was late to work for nothing. It is unlikely I'll even really need the police report and am just out $300 worth of equipment.

And work isn't working (hah) out the way it ought to, printers are jamming, My list is just growing by the minute with things to do, I need a break. But really people, knowing me you know that this is how my life goes every day. It's just one slap in the face after the other with a few funny things happening in between.

A few months back C also had his car broken into.
He had quite a bit of stuff stolen out of his car too. I don't remember the exact amount, but around the same amount as mine.

Our conversation this morning went a little like this...

C: do you ever have one of those nights where you remember your dreams being really awesome, yet in the morning you cant remember a single one?

E: Yup. My car got broken into. (Notice how I just jump into this, probably should ask about the dream thing at some point.)

C: EFFFFFF at your house?

E: Yes.

C: did they take anything?

E: All of my music stuff and my $5 in change (for emergencies, duh)

C: Wow what dicks. I'm sorry.

E: Yup. I'm frackin' furious.

C: so they got your ipod and radio?

E: Ipod, tape deck charger. They would have had to rip my radio [out of the dash]

C: I'll kill the mricker frickers.

E: Right?

C: I'm serious.

E: So am I. we can be each others alibi

C: I'll get this one and flee to Mexico

E: Okay

E: I vote we go in it together. Mexico would be boring without me there. Duh.

C: but seriously. I hate [place we are from] sometimes. instead of stealing those buttcracks should just get jobs.

E: 100% agreed.

C: you would have to change your name. but yeah, i would love to flee to mexico with you.

E: why would I change my name?

C: think Spanish. your name can't be "ella". well, i guess it could. i guess its up to you. but if we are fleeing, we might wanna change our names.

E: You change your name, I'll stick with mine, people will be so confused by ella that they'll never find me!!

C: Oh man, what would my name be?

E: hmmm.. something clever that sounds like a name but would confuse everyone.

C: Chris sanchez

E: No like vaca or bato or something. duh.

C: how about Gato Enfuego

E; Cat what?

C: on fire

E: L.O.L

C: please don't laugh at my stupid jokes. it just encourages me.

E: BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA (for 160 characters)

C: bajajajajajajajajaja

E: Oh good! You are practicing (laughing) for Mexico!

C: nope, practicing the laugh im gonna use when i murder who stole your ipod.

E: niiiice.

Okay so the naughty words were changed for cleaner versions. Seriously was dropping some bad language today, but I'm alotted that on an occasion such as this.. My mother is currently thinking to herself, 'what is your excuse every other time?'

Well, I'm off to see what I can do about getting a police report filed and possibly getting my money back from all that was stolen. Unlikely to happen, but worth a shot.

I hope everyone's day is a thousand times better than mine has been!

Thursday, July 29, 2010

This really is typical behavior. For me at least.

So my best friend and I work the same schedules (at different places) sometimes and the only way we get through the horribly long morning is by texting.

Usually, our conversations are short and sweet, other times they are ridiculous.

For whatever reason, I find this morning's conversation particularly hilarious and have decided to share it with you.

You're Welcome.

First, a little background information..

My friend got married a little over a year ago and for the first time in like 5 years I had a piece of cake. I haven't stopped craving sweets all day every day. I want chocolate all day long. I long for swedish fish every time I pass them or someone mentions fishing (I work for the Boy Scouts, so you see my dilemma with this) I try every cake presented to me, etc.. etc..

Recently, I've been trying to save money and have decided one way I'm going to do so is by not having to by new jeans come winter time. This means I have to lose a few pounds and cut a few inchs off my waist. I'm not fat by any means, I just am really poor and will, apparently, do anything to save a couple dollars.

So this morning C (what we shall call him) and I are texting away...

C: [writes stuff that doesn't pertain to this post] oh man, somone brought in donuts. im avoiding them but they look immaculate.

E: Bring me one.

C: ok

E: Wait! I cand eat that n

E: *cant eat the nonsense. I'm trying to look hot again remember.

E:  Sorry my fingers got all send happy on that first one.

C:  I could tell lol. trying to look hot...yeah good luck

E: F*** you. Ar you saying it can't be done?

C: i would already think you were super hot... if you werent a dude

E: Lol!

C: truth

E: Meh. Not even offended.

C: Haha. Take it as a compiment                             <---- that is 100% accurate to his spelling.

E: A compiment? Oh C* yew soh gooh at sperring

C: ah tanks erra. you nah you rove meh

E: Yew keehhp terring yewserf thah.

C: aw shrit :(

E: Since when us the and L in shit?

C: huh ahah

E: I am apparently drunk at work.. or honing in on my [not giving name] drugged up language.

E: *since when IS THERE AN L in shit? Betteh?

C: i so confrused

C: but dehr isnt an ehr in shrit

E: We substitues R's for L's. Put two and two together.

C: awwww i understand naooo. you so funry

E: Do we just add r's where ever now

C: mraybrey.

E: K. Again. Brogposs                          <-- We talk about this blog and you guys all the time! Feel special!

C: jaja

E: Why are we substituting ramdome letters for everything now?!

C: that was spanish

E: Msguwj translate that

C: ella thats inappropriate to say that to me

E: How so

C: I translated...inappropriate

E: umm what did it say fooh?

Can't make this stuff up people.

Yes so, we frequently text and talk in asian accents (our interpretation, not supposed to be hurtful and usually turns into something else or laughter) and say nonsense things.

Thats normal right?

We have possibly the weirdest conversations.

and if you are really nice good little readers, someday I'll share more with you. mraybrey.

Wednesday, July 28, 2010


Ladies & Gentleman (if there are any gents) gather round for I have a grand announcement.

How grand?

So grand, it will blow your minds.

I have managed...

wait for it...

to discover The 8th Wonder of the World.

Don't know what the first 7 are? Read. Learn. Enjoy.

Seriously people.


Are you ready to have your mind blown by this awesomeness?
i mean it is possible your brain will be turned to mush after reading this.

If it does I do not want you to sue me and say I didn't give you fair warning.
I'm giving you loads of warning right here.

Make sure you prepare yourself NOW with whatever you can, be it booze, valium, punching bag, twinkies, etc..

Alright. I've warned you. Given sound (hah) advice on what to do and told you not to sue me. I think I've covered my bases thoroughly enough..

So I guess I'll stop beating around the bush and just come out and say it.

The 8th Wonder of the World is...

Guys & Girls CAN be best friends.


Not possible you say?

Well go bury your face in a pile of something stinky or prickly because you are wrong and that is what I feel should happen to people who are wrong. Then they are stinking pricks! hah!.. ahem.. not the point.

One of my best friends is a guy.

*holy shit, is she serious?*
[why yes, yes i am]

No one, but my boyfriend and a select few others, believes that we aren't dating or that something isn't going on between us.

Clearly, everyone is under the impression that mixed gender relationships cannot exist in the world. Just because you are a douche that can't hold down such a relationship without thinking with your downstairs head doesn't mean they don't happen.

I guess you now understand that it is, of course, mostly guys that believe this kind of thing isn't possible. 

Our friends we have known for years refuse to believe it no matter how we explain it.

I mean, we have said no, we aren't dating or hooking up 1,234,524,546,312,967,856,482 times and we aren't lying.

We are best friends. Duh.

We talk about life.
We bitch about everything.
Joke about everything else.
We talk with our version of Asian accents.
Listen to music.
Usually over coffee.

It isn't anything different than what we do as a group. We just don't really care for certain people all the time and therefore choose to discuss these topics on a regular basis without the other fools.

Well, that clearly means we are dating/getting it on or whatever they think is happening.

Its not. It will never happen.
End of story.

I do realize that this isn't always the case when it comes to this phenomenon.
Some of these relationships do turn into something more and I say good for them!!
But, that is not what is happening here.

Did you know there are people out there that don't like me because they think we are lying about our friendship?

It's getting ridiculous.

So ladies & (if you are out there) gents, it is possible for a guy and a girl to be JUST friends and nothing more.

I know. Your mind is blown.
Let me know if you need help finding all the pieces!

**a good portion of this post is sarcastic though it may come across differently in writing. Please note that I am aware that people already know about this phenomenon, I'm just super fed up with getting bombarded with all these stupid questions all the time. Yes, that was my rant.

Monday, July 26, 2010

Losing it.

The pants I'm wearing today make me want to be on a yacht on the East Coast.

No joke.

I'm in such a funky place these days which explains my lack of motivation to really post like I should or keep up with the 30 days of truth. I'm in the middle of 3 paintings. Some day I'll finish them.

Goodness I need a vacation.

August 14th CANNOT come soon enough.

I have some pretty amazing ladies lined up to keep you entertained while I'm away painting and enjoying time with my family.

I got some fabulous new clothes.
Retail therapy with my mom always helps.
I guess we were both feeling a little blue.

I'm working on it though.

I really just need a solid jam session in my car with my windows rolled down and me not giving two shits that I'm singing obnoxiously and most likely off key to myself while people drive by giving me glares because I'm literally bursting their ear drums.

Okay, I'm really not a bad singer.
I'm actually quite good, but don't tell anyone I ever admitted to that.

Darn it.. I forgot my mom reads.


What music do you listen to when you are in a funk? 
I could use some new stuff to learn the words to and belt in the car all alone.

Day 17

Day 17 → A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.

For those of you who haven't caught on, I'm absolutely addicted to reading. So for me to come up with a single book that changed my views on something is difficult.
One that stands out in particular is "The Art of Racing in the Rain".
If you haven't read this book yet, go out there and buy it, borrow it, whatever and read it.
I sat down with this book and 4 hours later I was done and crying.
The story is told from the dog's point of view. I'd never read a story about a person from the perspective of their pet but let me tell you it made all the difference in the world.
It opens your eyes to how any and all creatures percieve you and definitely makes you wonder if they are that aware of what happens.
It made me appreciate the blessings I have in life more so than before and I tell ya, I loved animals just a little more than I did before. :)